Perfect Appearances 24/7

 Mary Poppins; Ms. Practically Perfect.

Mary Poppins,  comes to the aid of a set of parents who are not able to "be" for their children.  She knows how to enjoy life and the presence of the children in her care AND she is in control!  Don't we all want to be in control. She is so attractive, and yet she creeps me out. Everything works out lovely in the end. As dreamy as Ms. Practically Perfect is, she is not within my reach, as a parent nor in my relationship with others,

Before I became a parent, I had never laid eyes on an infant that I thought was beautiful  God was merciful and gave me a perfect baby that was perfectly beautiful, probably so I could be in awe of her, despite her demanding ways. I wanted to be in control, but it didn't work out that way. I was mostly ok with letting Dana run my life, because she was so beautiful.

Respect and reverence shouldn't be contingent on the beauty of a person, event or thing.  But beauty does inspire these attitudes.  That is why beautiful Cathedrals exist.   Yet being awed by the tabernacle rather than the Bread of Life waiting for us within is backward.  I fear my own attraction to beauty.  St. Francis and your leper friends, pray for me. Mother Theresa and the souls you bathed at the threshold of death, pray for me.

The human person desires perfect Love, Justice/Goodness, Beauty, Truth, and Being.  Expecting perfect Love, perfect Justice/goodness, perfect Beauty, and perfect Being from myself or others in this fallen world is somewhat foolish and when I demand it from myself and others, I loose my peace.   "Only in God is my soul at rest."

Foolish I am, in my alternative universe, surrounded by beautiful faces.  Observation:  I have had friends that I admired and attempted to emulate that were in the habit of keeping immaculate homes, and immaculate appearances.  These friendships inspired order and beauty in my own home.  I have two "Sacred Spaces" in my house that are fruits of my relationship with one friend that I never see any more.   Life has never been the same due to my relationship with Regnum Christi (RC),  founded by a man who was not the Holy man he appeared to be.  Yet RC was the impetus for a transformation in my heart that I am grateful for.

The pressure to be perfect 24/7 can be very hard on a relationship.    It is not a surprise when the "perfect appearance" curtain falls, but in the three cases I can think of, where the curtain fell on my friends they were so entangled in it, that I haven't seen them since.

The practice of suffering the unknown gives me an opportunity to offer up all the unknown redemptive-ly. Having to place my worries and cares to the foot of the Cross brings me into the presence of Christ, on a regular basis, strengthening my union with the Holy Trinity.  As Dr. Muto says:  "What matters is the deepening of our relationship with our Lord and in the light of that mysterious intimacy all else eventually works itself out."  I would rather be begging God for grace 24/7 than insisting perfection from myself or others 24/7!

Mary Poppins isn't real, but I do have an example of a person who was good with children and lovely. 
His example of simplicity and detachment in his encounters with others, inspires me to be responsible for living in the Love Will of the Father, offering the invitation to others 24/7 .  The fruit of love is our eternal surprise, I think I can wait.

For Ever Grieving Presence

Cecilia took this picture in the fall.  Our baby was due on October 18, two days before Dave and my 26th wedding anniversary.   Dominique/Dominic would be 6 months old.  We buried the baby's remains under this rock under our maple tree.  I have always thought of this as sacred space.  Now all the children we play with in the neighborhood know it as so. This baby, so far and probably will not have, a following.  Our first lost child was followed by Dana.  If that person had made it, we would not have our Dana.  We were consoled.  I look back on this year and think of all the things we have done that may not have been attempted with a baby in tow.  Cecilia's theater adventures and Maleny's Kung Fu.  I can be grateful, but I think the consolation will come in Eternity when we will meet our  First and Eighth face to face.  But I am still hoping.